The mistress of the house
She has to be a multi-skilled manager, capable of dealing competently with husband, children and servants. The passages below emphasise the importance not only of her organisational skills, but of her temper or character,and contrasts the ideal housewife with other types of women, who are not so committed to domesticity.
'Gentleness, not partial and temporary, but universal and regular, should pervade her conduct ...'
'As with the commander of an army, or the leader of an enterprise, so is it with the mistress of a house. Her spirit will be seen through the whole establishment; and just in proportion as she performs her duties intelligently and thoroughly, so will her domestics follow in her path. Of all those acquirements which more particularly belong to the female character there are none which take a higher rank, in our estimation, than such as enter into a knowledge of household duties; for on these are perpetually dependent the happiness, comfort and well-being of a family.
'In this opinion we are borne out by the author of The Vicar of Wakefield who says: "The modest virgin, the prudent wife, and the careful matron, are much more serviceable in life than petticoated philosophers, blustering heroines, or virago queans [sic]. She who makes her husband and her children happy, who reclaims the one from vice and trains up the other to virtue, is a much greater character than ladies described in romances, whose whole occupation is to murder mankind with shafts from their quiver, or their eyes...".
'Good Temper should be cultivated by every mistress, as upon it the welfare of the household maybe said to turn; indeed its influence can hardly be over-estimated, as it has the effect of moulding the characters of those around her, and of acting most beneficially on the happiness of the domestic circle.
'Every head of a household should strive to be cheerful, and should never fail to show a deep interest in all that appertains to the well-being of those who claim the protection of her roof. Gentleness, not partial and temporary, but universal and regular, should pervade her conduct; for where such a spirit is habitually manifested, it not only delights her children, but makes her domestics attentive and respectful; her visitors are pleased by it, and their happiness is increased.'
Isabella Beeton's description of the character and responsibilities of the ideal mistress of the house compares her to an army commander. The mistress has the power to influence the atmosphere of the entire household - therefore it is incumbent upon her not only to radiate good temper but also to be disciplined and organised.
Thus the mistress is at the core of the household - everything revolves around her, but at the same time, if anything goes wrong, then she is to blame. In this way Mrs Beeton places a great deal of responsibility on a woman's shoulders. In short, the mistress is to be selfless.
The good housewife was she who sacrificed her own needs to the comfort and happiness of her family and household. Hence Beeton's dismissal of learned or feisty, independent women ('petticoated philosophers' and 'blustering heroines'), who put their own ambition above the needs of others.
