Bees stop play!
| 05:11 UK time, Wednesday, 5 December 2007
What is it about wildlife and this tour of Sri Lanka!
On the opening day of the first warm-up game the main talking point was the two snakes that made their way to the edge of the playing area. Matthew Hoggard was especially keen to identify the reptiles. Then on the way to Kandy the England team stopped off at the famous .
We've had several stray dogs on the field during both the warm-up matches and the Kandy Test and monkeys crawling all over the "Congratulations Murali" signs that surround the Asgiriya stadium.
But on Tuesday we had what I would imagine was a rare event - "Bees stop play".
We were watching the action just after tea waiting for Sri Lanka to declare when suddenly we heard
A massive swarm of insects had arrived in the centre of the pitch causing a certain amount of panic - umpire Aleem Dar was apparently the man who raised the alarm. Play was stopped for around five minutes before everyone was happy the bees had buzzed off. It led to a whole host of hilarious gags in the commentary box. Would there be a "sting in the tale" ... England's batsmen looking a bit "waspish" ... you can imagine the rest.
The bees were not the only dangerous creatures to appear in the middle during the Kandy Test. After the heavy rain on Sunday the groundstaff peeled back the covers to discover a family of scorpions had found a home on the pitch. One of the creatures apparently stung one of the groundstaff.
We discovered during the Test that the staff who prepare this ground are actually convicts from the open prison in Kandy serving the final part of their sentence. TMS new boy Simon Hughes went to chat to some of the prisoners and discovered one man whose crime had been taking heroin. He was a genuine cricket enthusiast: "I remember seeing Bob Willis and Ian Botham - great cricketers".
But he then made quite a revelation to Simon: "I saw Jonathan Agnew bowl here - what a brilliant bowler". We couldn't decide whether his judgement had been affected by taking a banned substance or perhaps his enthusiasm for Aggers skills had led to him being imprisoned!
It's been a fascinating place to broadcast Test Match Special with a wonderful view from our commentary box of the hills and mountains of . We have actually been broadcasting from what is a derelict gymnasium with various benches and gym equipment discarded in the corner.
What has caused plenty of amusement is an honours board placed behind our commentary position where the names are marked for the "Best Physique Contest Winners" with a prize awarded for "Mr Trinity" and "Muscular Boy".
I am not sure who wrote the name "J.P.Agnew" as the winner of "muscular boy 2007" but I am told Angus Fraser may be the culprit. Aggers got his own back by revealing on the air that Angus had just signed up for the 2008 beach cricket competition in Australia. "You always looked like you were running through sand anyway when you were bowling" he said.
°ä´Ç³¾³¾±ð²Ô³Ù²õÌýÌýPost your comment
good to see a good bit of banter between the tms commentators!
Complain about this comment
Shouldnt really joke about a man's imprisonment should you...I mean whatever his crime it is no laughing matter.
Complain about this comment
Well done VFAF, this was nearly a light hearted and amusing discussion until you, quite correctly, set us right. The joke was not even about the prisoner, it was merely a mild shot at Aggers made using the cause for imprisonment as a pucnhline - I can only presume that you have suffered a similar fate to the gentleman and are therefore somewhat touchy about it... Get over yourself!
Complain about this comment
Nice piece. very entertaining, made all the funnier by VFAF's piety.
In a cricket mad country like Sri Lanka it is a pretty imaginative way of rehabilitating prisoners. Incidentally, try visiting a prison if you want to hear brutish humour!
Complain about this comment
What news of the delightful Shilpa? is she there with you, enjoying the warm weather ... and ferrying in strange and exotic cakes? Certainly hope so! Greetings to you all (especially Shilpa)
Complain about this comment
On the subject of animals stopping play :
I was playing for Caldy at Maghull CC's third team ground a few years ago and two goats from a neighbouring field managed to get onto the playing area.
We had to delay the game whilst they then proceeded to consummate their passion on the track.
This was apparently a regular occurrence, leading to a discussion as to whether cricket is a form of caprine viagra!
Complain about this comment
Well said "TheUndertow," Some people need to cheer up a little! Great article.
Complain about this comment
Simon,
Shilpa (I'm assuming you are talking about Shilpa Shetty, who won the Big Brother) is an Indian. If I'm not mistaken, she lives in Mumbai, which is in India and way off Kandy (or for that matter Sri Lanka) where this match is being played now.
So, the chances of Shilpa being there with Adams and Aggers watching a test match between England and Sri Lanka is pretty slim. Make that zilch.
Complain about this comment
Presumably he was referring to Shilpa Patel who works on the TMS team
Complain about this comment
Spiffy - actually regular listeners of TMS will know that Simon is referring to another Shilpa who is a key member of the TMS production team - so quite possibly there with the rest of the crew working away for our listening enjoyment in Sri Lanka!
Complain about this comment
Warm-up game or Swarm-up game?
Complain about this comment
Now in my 80s and no doubt considered very old fashioned I am almost convinced that we now do not need human umpires much as I deplore the "modern" influences affecting my beloved game. No longer is the umpire's decision to be taken as FINAL and without argument. Maybe the only function left is for the human to be solely a judge of the laws concerning sportsmanship and take over if the electronics fail.
I do not speak from a position of ignorance as I had the honour to play with some of the greats Alec Bedser, Compton, Edrich etc., and was coached by Charlie Hallowes, Learie Constantine and George Pope. I was also offered a trial for Derbyshire in their heyday.
Complain about this comment
Where were the bees when we really needed them as England batted in vain to save the match? Even the forces of nature were against us!
Complain about this comment
But why did the Bees come in the first place? For what purpose?
And why then did they leave just as suddenly?
I am genuinely intrigued...
Complain about this comment
Vincent
Good to hear from you.
Did you hear Simon Hughes's comments on Test Match Special? He clearly feels the third umpire's responsibilities should be increased and is not at all happy with the existing system.
England would have beaten India at Lord's and would have probably saved this match but for human errors by umpires - forgivable errors maybe - but massively important ones.
Complain about this comment
Not that I am really into cricket that much... I do for example find it a little irksome that so many matches are played between the same few internation teams and that people still think each game has importance. I do find it annoying that people bet on cricket so much and therefore it is open to match fixing or at least open to minor fixing for betting purposes. But what really gets me is that England can not regularly muster up a large enough score in a second innings to wing a Test Match. They failed again to reach a score of around 350 when Sri Lanka had gotten 400+ in their second innings. Instead England go down for around 260 in their second innings. That was 90 short of reaching their target so not far away from the 350 or so needed. England Cricket Team regurlarly fails to get a result off the last innings. Australia and South Africa and even New Zealand and perhaps India and Pakistan might have batted out the day and made the Sri Lankans sweat. Why is it that England fail to do this nearly always? Is it that England can not handle pressure batting or is it that they are just not as good as most of the other Test Sides? Or is it an England thing in general - like with football when our team can win against anybody if there is no pressure or if they have things go their way but if there is difficulty and things go against them they can not get back in but fall down then fail?
How come England isn't resilient at cricket? How come England in football can beat anyone on their day in a friendly but when it matters in tournaments they lose to those big teams they often beat in friendlies?
Richard
Complain about this comment
my friend as an Indian i feel the same about India...i can assure you that they would have lost by lunch
just yesterday they could not get pakistan out ...this is after posting 600+ in the first innings
so u are not alone!!!
cheers
Complain about this comment
Seems appropriate that England sent their B team.
Complain about this comment
beeeeeeeeeeeeeeee's
Complain about this comment
I like my coffee like I like my cricketers... Covered in bees!!
Complain about this comment
Vincent, can you please remind us all exactly when Derbyshire's heyday was as we may have nipped to the loo and missed it. Ta.
Complain about this comment
It all looks very very suspicious- cobras, bees, scorpions. This sure is Sri Lanka's plan B.
Complain about this comment
Maybe the bee's were after Andy Flower?
Complain about this comment
Maybe the bee's were after Andy Flower?
Complain about this comment
So Sri Lanka at least had a Plan Bee ... Did England have to rely on Brentford's footballers?
Complain about this comment
Bees swarm?
That was aussies led by Shane Warne
Complain about this comment
to answer number 21, derby's heydey will be the beginning of next season, seeing that they have just signed mahela jayawardene for the 1st half of the season.
Complain about this comment