麻豆社

Foxcatcher is in cinemas from Friday 9 January, certificate 15.听

, from the Almedia Theatre, is showing at The May Fair Hotel in London until Saurday 7 February.

Historical document and autograph expert discusses the Elvis brand and memorabilia sales. 听

By Ian McMillan

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Just takes a bit longer, a little bit longer,

To get into the jumpsuit. Both of us:

Me and him. Can you fit a pacemaker

To a wooden heart?

That鈥檚 one of the jokes I use.

It gets a laugh. A cheesy grin.

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Just move a bit slower, a little bit slower,

You can hear the knees popping as I gyrate:

Creaking like stairs. Down at the end

Of Old Age Street in Heartbreak Care Home.

That鈥檚 one of the songs I sing.

It gets a laugh. From the rocking chairs.

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He never stopped working, so I carry on;

He keeps on singing; I鈥檓 forced to as well

Till the pelvis, the quiff have slipped and gone

And the jacket鈥檚 a hollowed out shell.

We鈥檙e a mirror-image, one of the other.

Elvis and the man who would be him.

I could be his statue. I look like his brother.

He was once youthful. I was once slim.

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Just stand in the light, a little shook up

By the passage of Time. Return to Sender?

Not for a while. I just wanna be

Your teddy bear-shaped commode.

That鈥檚 one of my better lines.

It makes them wheeze. I force a smile.

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80 years thrusting from youth to old age

I鈥檓 him and he鈥檚 me; we鈥檙e peas in a pod.

The music kicks off and we stride on the stage.

I catch his eye; he smiles and I nod.

Course I鈥檝e never met him; we鈥檙e oceans apart

From Vegas to Barnsley鈥檚 a heck of a trip

But as we grow older he grows in my heart,

Now strike up the band and I鈥檒l curl up my lip!