麻豆社

What makes a good friend?

Is it helping each other through the darkest times or just having a good old natter over a brew?

麻豆社 Radio 5 Live has been asking listeners for their stories of amazing friendships. Click here to listen on 麻豆社 Sounds.

Jodie and Nadene met two years ago while they were both in the same intensive care ward. Both had just had reconstruction work after mastectomies due to cancer.

Jodie says she remembers calling out to Nadene after spending a couple of days together in intensive care:

“We’d only just come round and I remember calling out to the person opposite to ask how they were doing. Once we started talking it was actually nice to have the comfort of somebody else in the room who had also been through the same thing and knew what you were going through, and how you were feeling both mentally and physically.

“We spent five days in the intensive care ward and then we ended up on the normal ward for five days. We were down other end of the corridor but when we were able to, we used to get someone to help us wander up and sit with the other one, just have a chat and pass the time."

Nadene says she appreciated Jodie reaching out to her: “I just heard this voice from behind the curtain saying: ‘Hi Nadene, How are you? My Name’s Jodie’.

“For me it was actually really lovely to have somebody just start up a conversation because it made you feel you weren’t alone. It’s an awful thing to have to go through and it just comforted me to know that there was somebody that was happy to talk to you as well.

“Jodie was so easy to talk to and I felt as if I’d known her for ages, not just a couple of weeks."

What started out as a business query through Instagram led to an enduring friendship between entrepreneur Amy and blogger Fiona.

Amy says she initially contacted Fiona to see if she would promote her business online but the quickly got talking. "[We] realised we had loads in common, especially around mental health. The internet is a brilliant way to build a little community and find your tribe, even if it’s super niche.”

Fiona is a mental health blogger and says both she and Fiona had struggled to find people to understand what they were going through: "I have social anxiety so when you get to speak to someone online first, it can be helpful because you can say all the awkward things without having to say it face to face and when you finally meet them, that hard part is over."

The pair now regularly meet face to face and have started a podcast talking about mental health.

Lizzie and Sarah both have congenital muscular dystrophy (CMD). They started emailing each other 16 years ago when Lizzie’s mum met Sarah and her mum at a CMD conference.

Lizzie’s elder sister Alexandra, who also had CMD, was also online friends with Sarah until she died in 2015.

Lizzie says she and her sister were excited to be able to write to somebody else with the same condition: “When we found out Sarah is actually only a year older than Alex was, it was incredible. It made us so happy to know there was somebody out there that had the same experiences as us.

“When Alexandra passed away, we received a lot of support from Sarah. I feel that since I lost Alexandra, it’s been so special for me to have a friendship with Sarah because I haven’t got Alexandra with me anymore."

The friends are members of the same support group for their medical condition but had never managed to travel to the same meet-up until July 2018.

Lizzie says: “It was a Saturday afternoon in July last year and when we got there and saw each other it was really fantastic... we probably talked non-stop for about two hours and our mothers did exactly the same.

“We left them in one corner of the room and Sarah and I were in another corner and we just chatted about all sorts of different things.”

Sarah says: “We felt like we’d already met in a sense because we’d chatted so frequently. With Facebook you’re almost a part of somebody’s life because you see what they’re doing and their family occasions. It was quite emotional for our mums as well – it was a lovely afternoon."

Sherica was setting up a residential home for vulnerable young women when she herself became homeless.

"I was in a situation where I could either rent two places, which was my own home and the home for the girls and be in more debt, or take the risk and just move back home with my mum and rent the home for the girls," she says.

"Obviously I moved back to my mums but me and my mum had a bit of a clash. So after that incident I was homeless for about 18 months.

"Throughout that time, Lisa just kept me going when I felt down. In that time I was suffering from depression and felt suicidal, I felt stupid because I was like ‘I can’t believe I’m doing this, I can’t believe I’m taking these kinds of risks to help other people’ and Lisa was literally always the one in the background like 'sis, I’ve got you'."

When Sherica finally found the perfect home to rent, Lisa lent her the money for a deposit.

Lisa describes Sherica as her little sister: "I don’t really consider her to be a best friend - she’s like family. She’s the sister I choose. I’ve got one biological sister and I call Sherica the fun sister because she literally lights up a room and she keeps getting up no matter how many knock-backs she has because she is trying to make a difference and save lives.

"I’m just so touched by how much she gives and how hard she goes for others that I am just determined I’d do likewise for her."

has information and support for some of the issues covered in this article.