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Caption competition results

14:31 UK time, Friday, 8 June 2007

capcomp_deputies424.jpg
No, it's not the next line up for Pop Stars: the Rivals. This week's caption comp stars five of the six Labour MPs vying to succeed John Prescott as Labour's deputy leader.

But what's being said? Here are the winning entries...

6. Catherine O
When Hazel sent for peroxide and a handbag, Harriet knew the race was already won.

5. Dave Workman
Labour deputy leader contenders look on shocked as Alan Johnson falls down a flight of stairs.

4. MJF
"Yo, my name is Hazel, you can call me Blears
I stopped growing at about 12 years
We are the wannabe deputies to Brown
Listen to my rap and I'll break it down
This is Hilary, he's no Blair Babe
He's running on the back of his famous name
This is my honey, she aint top notch
Mickey Mouse wears a Harriet Harman watch
Poor Jon Cruddas, it's plain to see
He'll soon go back to obscurity
His chances were always quite remote
I doubt he'll get a single vote
Peter Hain is a dear old thing
But look at the Liberals now they've got Ming
Now Johnson's a threat and he talks real tough
But don't be deceived 'cause it's all bluff
Who would you pick out of this little mob?
Does it really matter? It's a pointless job."

3. Stig
Alan Johnson: "One for the album, losers?"

2. Steve, Cambridge
Ms Blears was feeling rather cocky about the all-important limbo stage of the deputy leader contest.

1. Peter Stagg
After a long and gruelling three day meeting, it was finally agreed that scissors ranked higher than paper...

Thanks to all who entered.

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